top of page

Wise-Ass Animals  IN

Pants! *

 

(Which I consider

to be my genre) 

 

and you'll have

a damn lot of fun,

maybe as much fun

as I've had with  . . .

my GuySly.

_______

 

*   Crap!

 

The word is Pants!

Damn, they got lame a's 

in this font. 

He tried the flute,

made progress, but

savagely mocked,

he abandoned it. 

 

Years later,

he took up

 the fiddle.

 

 

Ode to a Nose

by S. Boots

 

Where does your foremost fascination lie?

I tell you, Mistress, not where you suppose.

You are magnificent of brow and eye,

but I rejoice, above all, in your nose.

 

Abundance of the snout is no vile thing,

an aperture odd, no horrific flaw.

Cavernous nostrils suck the scents of spring

more readily than dimple dents. What law

requires that a nose be slim, or pert,

to be admired, to be reckoned fine?

High handsome is less sturdily alert,     

admiring, above all, a divine profile.

 

The buttonholes, so meek, so sleek, so pink,

just darling, do not snort with the same greed

to savor life in all its sweet and stink,

as does your sneezer charmingly indeed.

 

A chiseled symmetry, it does not do

for a merry force of nature such as you.

Your thug has more exuberance than those

lady-like honkers. Celebrate your nose!

​

 

In A Dire Deceit, 

his ship taken by pirates, Sly hunkers  under a captain's desk, scrawling a phony code with his precious lead. A good smudge cakes the pages with grime,

spit warps them, producing an aged look. A plausible item

(at first glance, at least) is produced in a few tense hours.

 

Others latch onto the tool for their own amusing ends. And I'm not through exploiting the amazing technology myself.

 

Not by a long shot.

Puss in Boots Picture Book, published by

........., 1878

Monkey TK

2.

 

 

3.

 

 

Dee's image will be tweaked, this cat's head 

replacing the globe.

 

On the far right, that's a meercat. More historically accurate would be a monkey, but I need the right monkey, small, cat size, with 

a very ugly nose.

 

Sly has written a lovely sonnet

 in praise of the bizarre feature

to comfort one who, longing

to be esteemed a court

beauty, despises it.

 

 

 

 

 

You'll find his touching

 Ode to a Nose 

on page _

THIS PAGE 

TO COME. 

​

NOT QUITE SURE

WHAT IT WILL CONSIST OF.  

I HAVE SEVERAL IDEAS.

​

IGNORE THE BITS AND PIECES

LEFT BEHIND FROM A PREVIOUS EFFORT.

​

bottom of page